So much has gone on around here the last few days that it is making my head spin. I won’t go in to too much detail, but suffice to say my 36 year old step-daughter is walking a real fine line in breaking the law and is asking her father to be complicit in it! His refusal to do that, to lie for her is causing some major issues here.
I wrote a note to some friends and family other other night asking for adivce on how I should handle things. I am not her mother, I am merely her father’s wife. So, I have to tread lightly in some matters, regardless of my thoughts. This matter has caused significant arguements between her and us… especially when I hear comments like… “it’s no big deal, it’s not hurting anyone” and my favorite – “everybody does it”.
So as I said, I sent out a note asking for help and advice. Not a single response! What???? It wasn’t until yesterday when I read in my devotional “Quietness and trust accomplish far more than you can imagine…When you trust Me in a given area, you release that problem or person to my care.” (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young – page 267)
Why was I asking anyone else for advice? What was I thinking. I say with my mouth that He is my Lord and Savior in whom I place my complete trust. But when it comes to looking for advice, I go elsewhere??? I am such a mess. I knew it was time for me to shut my mouth. The constant argueing and bickering was out of control I wanted the joy back in my house. I decided that this is not a normal battle going on here. And I knew I had to ask God for His forgiveness for not trusting in Him and them handing over all of it to Him.
As I went about my chores yesterday afternoon, my step-daughter of course was on my mind. I heard in my thoughts, “Give her to me, Trust me with this one too”. TOO??? YES!!! That’s it. I was reminded of a book that I read at the begining of this year when we walked through a horrible, ugly time with my step-son and his drug addiction. Praise God, it has been 8 months and he is clean and sober and working everyday and doing generally well. He still has a very long road ahead of him, and alot of work to do. But everyday is a blessing. To read more about John’s journey:
But I digress…. What God was showing me was that I needed to give my step-daughter to Him. The battle was not mine to fight. This was about more than a legal issue, this was a battle for her soul.
I dug out this treasured book is called: “The Power of Praying For Your Adult Children” by Stormie Omartian and started reading again. And once again, the Author just blessed my heart with exactly what I needed to hear.
“We all must ask God to show us what to do, and what not to do, for our adult children. We have to seek God as to how to pray for them. We need to ask the Lord for clarity and discernment to know when to just pray and let Him work in their lives with any other help from us. Only God knows the right thing to do. And only when you have released your adult child completely into God’s hands and put the Lord in charge of their life can you ever have true peace. You can’t change your child, but God can. ” (page 11)
“Understand and believe that when you pray about your adult child, God will hear and answer. Prayer is not telling God what to do. Prayer is partnering with God to see that His will is done. You don’t have to fully understand what God’s will is in order to pray that His will be done.” (page 12)
The nuggets of truth and wisdom in this book are amazed. I am blessed as I turn each page. In the words of the author – “If you are just starting to pray for your adult child, it takes a while to turn that ship around and head it in a new direction. Keep on praying no matter what happens, and don’t give up. ”
So, we begin this prayer journey for our child. I pray that she will feel the nudging of the Holy Spirit when she contemplates her next decision. I pray for her as I prayed for her brother. They are both grown adults. Neither are going to listen to their father or me. So Lord, I ask you to find that perfect person and send them into her life. Let that person be a witness to Your love. Let them be a shining example of a life live in You. Lord I hand her over to You and I thank you in advance for the mighty work that You are going to do in her life. Amen.